Thursday, June 02, 2005

Miss Universe 2005

If there was one thing I got out of the Miss Universe pageant, it was the energy. I'm telling you, the energy that was coming out of Impact Arena Tuesday morning was amazing. I mean, sure, I've been to my fair share of concerts, but this was unlike anything else I've ever experienced. Unlike other gigs I've been to in the past, it wasn't manic teenybopper hormones that was driving the crowd, but rather pure patriotic pride and all that good stuff. Kind of like the World Cup, except more glamorous.

The sets and backdrops were gorgeous in real life, as were the contestants.
And no, I'm so not jealous I'm not six feet tall. Really, I'm not.
(Yeah right.)

I gotta say major props to the Puerto Ricans. They were MAD CRAZY and sooo supportive of Miss Puerto Rico, what with their army of congas and plethora of waving flags. You couldn't help but let their energy rub off on you -- I loved it! The Venezuelan and Mexican supporters were also pretty wild, but still, the Puerto Ricans truly took the cake.

First runner-up, Miss Puerto Rico

As for the Thai crowd, they were great. I think Thais really dig the Latina look, because when it became pretty obvious that Miss Thailand wasn't going to make it to the semifinals, they started cheering like mad for Miss Venezuela, Miss Dominican Republic, and Miss Puerto Rico. Poor Europeans. The crowd was especially fond of Miss Canada, though I do think a large part of it had to do with the charming wai and "kob khun ka" she added to the end of her answers. :)

"Kob khun ka," says Miss Canada.
And the Thai crowd goes wild.

I'm pretty proud to say my Miss Universe radar is still on par -- all my predicted contestants made it to the final round, as did my mom's personal fave.

Someone was really disappointed when Miss Venezuela didn't win.
Still, she was stunning, and will you take a look at that hecka stellar dress?
Amateurs need not apply -- it obviously takes killer curves and a ton of confidence to pull off a dress like that!

Miss Dominican Republic was pretty darn tall.
She's also a dead ringer for Jennifer Garner, all the way down to her trademark dimples.

"What? Me?"

Miss Canada being crowned by Jennifer Hawkins, Miss Universe 2004.

Miss Universe 2005

It was a tough call, but Canada's Natalie Glebova was a fine choice for Miss Universe 2005. Still, it has to be said, Latina power sure was blazing through Bangkok Tuesday morning!

Latina Power

Anyway, before and during the show, we were entertained by four of our American neighbors sitting in the row directly behind us. From this point forth, they will be dubbed Loud Americans #1, 2, 3 & 4. (More after the jump.)

As they were being seated, Loud Americans #1, 2, 3 & 4 commented on the location of their seats:
Loud American #1: Oh, isn't this just great.
Loud American #2: What?
Loud American #1: Look who's sitting next to us.
[Loud American #2 peers at the group of people seated next to LA#1]
Loud American #2: What about them?
Loud American #1: They're CHINESE.
Loud American #2: How do you know?
Loud American #1: (smugly) I know my flags.
Loud American #2: Huh.
Loud American #1: Let's hope they don't fire a nuclear missile at us.

Before the live broadcast, when Loud Americans 1, 2, 3 & 4 were trying to signal to their friend sitting on the other side of the arena:
Loud American #1 : (standing up; on cell phone with friend) Jess, we're over here! On the other side! Next to China.
Loud American #1: China? Their flag's red. With, you know, stars on them.
Loud American #1: No, not like the American flag. They have, like, yellow stars.
Loud American #1: How can you not see the Chinese flag? It's only the size of J-Lo's ass. (sighs dramatically) Okay, here, I'm waving at you. Can you see?
Loud American #1: How can you not see me?!?!?! (stands up to wave at friend from across the arena, accidentally banging Lynn's head in the process) Josh and Bex are totally waving, too! We're standing up in our seats. Do you need us to get our entire row to do the wave for you?!
Pissed Off Thai Person Sitting in Front of Me: (to her friend; in Thai) Hai thay si (translation = for the love of God, literal translation = go die). Are they too stupid to tell their friend that they're sitting right in front of the camera on the right wing of the stage? It's that easy. Why do they have to make everything so complicated?

During the pageant, when Miss USA appears on stage for the swimsuit show:
Loud American #2: WOOOOO! CHELSEA! GO USA! WOOOOO!!!
Loud American #3: YEAH! USA! GO USA! YEAAAHHH!!!
Loud American #4: Dude, Chelsea looks nervous.
Loud American #1: Yeah, she kinda does. She also looks kinda fat.
Loud American #2: Huh. You're right, she kinda does.
Lynn: (thinking to self) Oh, COME ON. If she's fat then I'm a nine-hundred pound cow!

Before the live broadcast, when the judges were being seated.
Loud American #1: Oh my God! It's Carson Kressley!
Loud American #2: Who? Carson Daly?
Loud American #3: No! She said Carson Kressley. You know, from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
Loud American #2: Ohhh, Carson Kressley. OH! MY! GOD! Carson Kressley!
Loud Americans #1, 2, 3: (squealing) Carson, WE LOVE YOU!!!
Pissed Off French Guy Sitting Next to Me: Ta gueule (translation = shut up).

Before the crowning, when it's down to Miss Puerto Rico and Miss Canada
Loud American #1: Oh my God, if Canada gets it, I swear I'm gonna scream.
Loud American #2: I KNOW! I mean, Canada?
Loud American #3: Dude, she doesn't even look Canadian.
Lynn: (thinking to self) And who are you to qualify what a Canadian should or should not look like?
Loud American #2: I know, I mean, how come she's so tan? They don't even get any sun in Canada.
Loud American #4: Puerto Rico! Go Puerto Rico! Boooo Canada! Canada sucks!
Billy Bush: And the first runner up is...Miss Puerto Rico! NatalieGlebovafromCanadaisMissUniverse2005!
Loud Americans #1, 2, 3: (screaming; evidently in much pain) OHMIGOD! I can't believe Canada won! AHHHHHH!
Loud American #4: (launches into that South Park song) Blame Canada...!!
Loud American #3: Dude, I'm so pissed. Let's go.
Loud American #2: Yeah, I'm leaving.
[LAs #1, 2, 3 & 4 get up and leave before the show even ends]

By the way, I wasn't, you know, eavesdropping or anything, but as my nickname for them clearly indicates, they were awfully loud. (I think it's more a matter of who didn't hear them.) Anyway, I don't know what was more entertaining -- the actual Miss Universe pageant or LAs #1, 2, 3 & 4. Whatever the case, I had a fun time. :)

Currently Playing: Dude (Looks Like a Lady) by Aerosmith, because no one can rock it quite like Steven Tyler, and I adore Aerosmith. Too bad everything on the radio nowadays is crap (hello, are you listening, Simple "get a clue, you are SO NOT rock and never ever will be" Plan?) Of course, I will humbly admit to being a bit of a Britney Spears fan. But that's, um, besides the point.
Currently Reading: Pride and Prejudice by the grandmother of modern-day chick lit, Jane Austen. This is the fourth time I've read this, and yes, Darcy still makes me swoon. (The fact that Colin Firth played him in the movie version has absolutely nothing to do with it. Really.)

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